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"New House Haunting"

Misdirection, a skill that some of the greatest magicians use. They lead your eyes astray while they do something in the opposite direction to make things appear as more than they seem. Sometimes people figure it out and dissect the process. Other times, the world isn't quite ready for the truth, their dark secret, to be revealed.

It felt like it was taking forever, but I finally made it to my new apartment to drop off my final load of boxes. I wish I would have brought someone with me to help with boxes, but I wasn't so lucky to find someone.
I got out of my car and headed to the back of my truck to grab a few smaller boxes. Start with the easy and finish with the challenging ones, that's the way my mind always worked. I climbed up the steps with them and unlocked my door to let myself inside.
I looked around my apartment. The walls were white and clean, leading down to a dark blue carpet that appeared brand new. I dropped the boxes on the counter and made my way back outside to grab some more things.

The final box had made its way inside and I slumped down on my recliner, exhausted from all the hard work. I was truly out of shape for not being able to do too much at a time. I could feel my old age gaining on me, weighing me down with the years yet to live.
I could feel my stomach growling, so I figured I could grab some food from the freezer I'd just unpacked, and cook it. I grabbed a skillet out of one of my boxes and turned on the stove. I felt it click but nothing happened, no flame appeared beneath the coil. I knew this was a gas stove, not electric. It should kick on. I tried it again but still nothing happened. I tried twisting the knob a few more times but no dice.
I shook my head and put the food back in the freezer. I figured I could call for some food to be delivered. So I did just that.
After I got off the phone, I heard a crash from the kitchen. I ran over to check it out but saw nothing out of the ordinary. What had happened? I investigated further but saw nothing. I went back to my chair and turned on the television. I slumped back and grabbed a package of cigarettes from my pocket. 
I was about to light it when I heard another noise from the kitchen. I charged in there and saw a fork sitting on the counter by itself. I laughed and took out my lighter. I was about to use it when the fork began moving toward me. I stumbled back to avoid it. It tried flying at my face but it missed.
I stood and chuckled a little more. Why the hell was a piece of silverware trying to kill me?
I lit my cigarette and the place went up in flames.

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